Here's my ticker!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Disclosure

One of the women in the blogs that I follow just decided to "come out" (i.e. start full identity disclosure on her blog)... This got me thinking about why I don't do the same... And I guess it's a good time to explain myself, in case anyone is wondering...

Initially, it was because my family didn't know I was going to start TTC. I didn't want them to know, at all, until I was well into pregnancy, lest their opinions (which I was sure wouldn't be positive) affect my emotional state during my early months (which I've heard is very important health-wise for fetuses).

Later, when I realized I wasn't going to have an easy time getting pregnant, and I decided to start telling family, I decided since my identity was already anonymous I may as well use it ocassionally to vent about my work. I figured since I already had the blog, may as well use it, and it was important to me to remain anonymous since I didn't want to get "dooced".

All of my family and friends already knew about me being gay, and me trying to get pregnant, so now it was about my work not finding out I was being "pissy".

Full disclosure? I used to work for a company called TeleTech, a "call center", so to speak, and they're generally very good, I just had really big asses as bosses, yet they shall remain unnamed to protect the poor souls that still work there!

Now, now it's a pain... I moved in order to be closer to family and to see if I could find a job outside the corporate environment, since it had become a stress factor and very toxic for my health. I moved to a very small town closer to my hometown, and got a job as an English Teacher at a private Jesuit school.

So far as I know, they don't know I'm gay, a fact that I'm sure they'd find very disturbing and which may lead me not to get a contract renewal. Here in Mexico it's still something you don't talk about, something said in hushed, whispered conversations, usually in a critical and judgemental manner. More so in an environment where, although the school staff might not mind it, there are some VERY conservative parents who might not agree with it, and who might cause me to lose my job. Of course, the school couldn't directly attribute it to that, but if my classroom were to lose half its student body, they might claim I'm an unfit or incompetent teacher and that it was the academical level which caused me to lose that many students. There are always ways around the reasons they use to fire you.

So anyway, I just wanted to explain why I choose to remain anonymous in such a public (yet private) media. However, if anyone wishes to know who I really am, I'd be more than glad to share more with anybody on a case-by-case basis! :)

2 comments:

(Erica) Rebel With.A.Cause said...

Awww you know I still love ya no matter what!!!

Dez said...

And if you're REALLY worried about keeping your identity secret you can always go to http://ventanon.com (I created it)

I appreciate what you're doing and keep on doing it. Being anonymous is one thing when on a site that has multiple people posting on it, but running an anonymous blog where you are the only one posting can be frustrating and risky. Even though I run ventanon.com I hardly ever post to it with an actual vent, usually I just post news and happenings on it, I don't need the anonymity...